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Yeah, Mon. I'm Solo.

Inevitably, I knew it would happen again. The looks of surprise. The dubious eyes. The incredulous faces when I tell people that I'm traveling by myself. I was greeted with more of the same during last week's New Year's Eve trip to Jamaica. When the question arises--and it always does somewhere in the conversation--from cab drivers, to hotel staff, waiters and waitresses to the nice man or woman at customs (ALWAYS the man or woman at customs), I've now created a standard response in the form of a question to counter these assaults. "Who else is going to take my ass on vacation?"
It still surprises ME that everyone else is so surprised. Since when did being single become a restriction on travel and adventure? Did the TSA come up with some new crazy law that women can't travel by themselves? (Although, at this point, I wouldn't put it past them in the name of 'national security' Ha. I can see it now . . . "Studies show single women traveling internationally pose a high threat to national security!" HA!) 
All I know is that it was snowy, cold, shitty here in NYC and waiting around for Prince Charming to come along on his white horse to take me to the sun was not an option. (Especially with the unplowed streets here in the city, but that's a whole OTHER story. Prince Charming would need to have 'snow hoofs' on.)
So, much like my Asia trip, I booked the ticket, found a place to stay and am a better woman for it. This trip to Jamaica did not disappoint. I met the most amazing women, many from NYC whose sole purpose was the same as mine (get out of the cold), and experienced things I most likely would not have had I been with a companion. I wrote letters to people whose relationships no longer served me, and burned them. (That was powerful. And it worked, like you can't even imagine!) I wrote in my journal. A lot. I sat and watched the ocean, listened to the waves crashing on the shore. I realized I didn't need a gym or fancy equipment to be happy and keep my body active. I walked, I ate, I jumped off 30' cliffs (!), I watched some of the most gorgeous sunsets I've ever seen. I listened. To myself and the stories of others. And I learned about yet another culture, another way to live. My solo travels have been life changing. 
One thing I love about traveling is being exposed to new foods and how different cultures eat. I feel a bit like the healthy version of Anthony Bourdain (by the way, in case he's reading this, I'm a HUGE FAN!!!) For those of you who don't know me, know this: I LOVE FOOD! This trip was no exception. Do you all know what 'callaloo' is? No worries (mon)! I didn't until I went to Jamaica. It is similar to spinach and it's often sauteed (With lots of salt. The Jamaicans love them some salty stuff!) I was ordering it left and right to ensure my daily intake of greens! I had it with some scrambled eggs and it was DELISH. Speaking of eggs, have you ever tried 'ackee'? It is the strangest food. It's a FRUIT, but the way they serve it, I swear, it has the same consistency of scrambled eggs. Is it good for you? Well, it can't be bad, it's natural. And yes, it CAN be poisonous, but it's definitely tasty, and when in Rome . . .
When I travel by myself, I get to dictate where and when I eat. Like the lovely afternoon I spent at Ras Rody's vegetarian stand. Rody is a Rastafarian serving up some of Jamaica's finest foods from the bounty of the earth. According to the website Rody is not only a vegan chef, but also "a successful organic farmer and roadside philosopher." Sounds like a good life to me. Simple. Natural. Living. Trust me, it's crossed my mind on more than one occasion to abandon the typical 'get it done' stresses of the Western world for a lifestyle where peaceful and calm are not foreign words.
Would it be nice to share some of my travel experiences with someone special? Absolutely? Am I going to wait for someone to give me permission to have those experiences? Absolutely not. My life isn't an episode of the Bachelor (although how fun would THAT be for a week or so?!?) and I've got living to do. 



13 comments (Add your own)

1. Janet wrote:
It is almost like pity for you. People feel that if someone is traveling, dining or just enjoying an evening or event alone it's poor you. Don't you have anyone, a friend, family, OR boyfriend. I agree that it is nice to share things with someone special. But your life does not end if you go it alone. I have friends that are couples and when they go on vacations they spend time mostly by themselves, well daytime. He likes to play golf and she likes the sun, (pool or beach). That has been the norm from what they tell me about their vacations. Now some of them have asked me to go with them instead. They want to enjoy the beach and not be nagged by someone that likes to tour the sites. As much as women need to speak our minds we also like to clear them. Sounds to me that you did and truly enjoyed it.

Tue, January 11, 2011 @ 6:32 PM

2. Jennifer wrote:
Thank you Janet for your support! I think you even read this entry before it was complete! I hope you'll re-read to learn about callaloo and ackee! :)
Keep it happy and healthy!
JG

Wed, January 12, 2011 @ 12:28 AM

3. Stacie wrote:
Jennifer- you inspire me. You vacation sounds utterly delightful. I always go with a group of other singles.... But I travel alone for work all the time. Somehow I have never put it together that I could travel alone for vacation too! Thanks for inspiring me... in exercise, in food and in singleness. :)

Fri, January 14, 2011 @ 6:31 PM

4. Jennifer wrote:
Amen Stacie! Do it!!! And maybe our paths will cross on mutual travels.
ENJOY and LIVE!!!

Fri, January 14, 2011 @ 11:55 PM

5. Stacey wrote:
You are so beautiful, physically and spiritually - who needs a partner, boyfriend, etc....I love your workouts and attitude!

Sat, January 15, 2011 @ 8:50 PM

6. Caroline wrote:
Love it Jen!

Sounds like you had an amazing trip and really made the most of it. I love the idea of the letters... what a good use of your time there. And next time I'm coming to Ras Rody's with you - he sounds like a man I'd like to meet (and food I'd like to eat!). Can't wait to catch up soon on the West coast xo

Tue, January 18, 2011 @ 12:53 AM

7. J Keene wrote:
Good for you, J. Nothing weird about traveling solo although I know it's hard to make the leap. I'm really glad it was a good experience for you. xo

Sat, January 22, 2011 @ 1:55 PM

8. Jennifer wrote:
amen, j.k. thanks! hope to connect with you sooner than later.
JG

Mon, January 24, 2011 @ 12:17 AM

9. George wrote:
Hi Jennifer,

What an inspiring blog.

Rarely do people step out of the own comfort zone to experience their wants. In addition, you can feel the liberation in your explanation of your time and adventures on your solo journey, as well as a cathartic release of some previously binding emotions.

Hopefully you inspire more of us to take control of our own person, and experience our true selves to live this gift that is life.

Thank you for sharing our experience, and I look forward to more adventures and writing from you.

Peace...
George.

P.S. - I agree Anthony Bourdain has such a great “no holds barred” way of adventuring and writing.

Wed, January 26, 2011 @ 9:29 AM

10. Laura wrote:
Thanks for sharing your post Jennifer. I've been trying to get sister and friend to go out this weekend for a Bob Marley Reggae celebration, but rats! no takers...it's been a really long time since I've been out to a club to dance... so, I am going anyway.. like you said, who else is going to take me??? I've learned all these really cool World Beat Hip Hop dance steps (thanks to you) and i just got to go... so yeah Mon I'm solo too :)

Best to you,
Laura

Fri, February 4, 2011 @ 2:49 PM

11. Nicole wrote:
I have to say that I am a person who really enjoys exercising...but WHO KNEW that I would ever actually look forward to doing an ab workout?? I absolutely love the 10 minute ab routine in your Fat Blasting Dance Mix (not to mention all the dances/exercises...) I look forward to trying your other workouts. Keep up the wonderful work you are doing. This field is defintely your calling.

Peace and long, happy life.

Mon, February 14, 2011 @ 8:46 PM

12. Lynn Nanos wrote:
You are so inspirational. I am only 11 away from my goal weight. I've lost 27 pounds since reaching my highest ever. When I do achieve this, it will be HUGE, because I've been struggling and unable to do this for 13 years.

My reward for reaching this goal will be going alone for a vacation to a spa resort. It will be my first time ever going on a vacation alone. It will feel a bit weird, but you just helped to normalize the beauty of doing this. I'm married, and have been on vacations lots of times with family members.

Thu, May 5, 2011 @ 2:31 PM

13. Amy wrote:
No updates for us, lady? Hope all is good and that you're enjoying the spring!

Amy

Wed, May 18, 2011 @ 3:42 PM

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